Fixing a Leak (in my Brain)

The pump shaft seals I ordered did not come on Friday, so the pump will be down at least until Monday, a fact that ate away at me Friday afternoon, causing me to look out the window for the UPS truck no fewer than 20 times, brooding like some heart-sick teenager waiting for a date to arrive, practicing my lines for the driver (like what happened, did you like forget I even existed?).

But the truck did not come and as night came on, and without Cheryl here to forestall it, my broodiness gave way to something darker. At the same time a balancing thought was struggling to reach my consciousness, and not for the first time this week. In fact, it has occurred to me several times that it would be nice, now that the water level is down, to repair a leak in one of the pond walls. Only on Friday night I'm so busy being mad about the pump seals that nothing else matters. Probably by 10 pm, the revelation burst through to me. The pump seals were late for a reason. It was a sign: it was time to fix the leak, and I had all weekend to do it. A miracle.

So this morning I filled a plastic bag with dirt and made a little dam. Then I took the shop vac and dried out the area by the leak. Perfect. At first I tried to seal the cracks with silicon caulk, but it was too wet and besides what I really wanted to do (and in an obsessive sort of way) was mix up some concrete and put a skim coat on the entire section of wall. Nothing is more fun that slapping down some concrete. Roof tar or something similar would probably have been better (for you critical people out there who want to judge me) but I wanted to mix up some concrete, OK?

Sometimes the universe sends you a message, like mix up some concrete and fix the leak once and for all, you ignorant fool, when you have the chance.

Here's some star jasmine (Jasminum nitidum) growing in my side yard. It seems especially happy this spring. I also found a new patch of it growing along the sidewalk in front, in a place where I cleared back some weeds last winter.

Clear away the negative and something nice will (eventually) take its place.